The following is a reflection by one of my student Linda* (Not her real name)
The incident:
We
opened school on January 9th for the new academic year 2017 . As I
approached the school gate, happy voices of children playing in the school
compound rent the air. They were so excited to resume school again after
staying at home for nearly one and a half months during the Christmas Holidays. When they saw me, they all rushed towards me
and happily shook my hand to welcome me in school. I too was excited to meet
them. Looking at their faces I was so hopeful that all will go well throughout
the term.
As
I walked towards the staffroom, I wished and prayed that all the pupils who
would be assigned to me will be good to teach in order to have a break from the
tedious follow up work I had to do with a few of my learners in the previous
class. Little did I know that a worse situation awaited me in my new class.
During
my first encounter with my learners in class three, I never noticed any odd
behavior among my learners. I was their new teacher of English. Since most of
the learners were unfamiliar to me I made an effort to learn their names on the
first day. Two weeks had gone by and it came to my attention that one of my
pupils who was new in the school never brought any writing materials to class,
that is a pen and a pencil. Each time we had to write an exercise I had to ask
his colleagues to lend him a pencil or a pen. With time his behavior advanced
to deliberate negligence of any class work or homework given at school. His
academic performance went from better to worse.
One
day, I must have been having a bad day, I suppose. As usual I found the boy had
not brought any writing materials to class. Soon I ordered him to get out of my
class and to always do so whenever I came into class unless he brings what he
requires in class. I could not take his behavior anymore. He walked out. I taught
the other students and made up my mind to forget about him. As a matter of fact
he was the only student who behaved so in my class. Other learners made an
effort to finish their work in good time.
Why the incident stood out?
This
learner was exceptional in my class. Everyone else cooperated and took part in
all the class activities actively. Besides not having the writing materials,
the boy always looked sad and kept aloof from the company of fellow students.
He hardly took part in any play activities and games. He was ever irritable
whenever companions approached him for anything.
What was not interesting about this
incident?
What
bothered me most about the boy was he often beat up other learners. He had
become a bully, a real nut. Any pupil who came across his path often left with
a spank. One day, I was called out of class to answer some emergency. When I
came back I was shocked to find him holding another boy by the throat and
beating him seriously. If I had stayed a minute more, what could have happened
to the boy he was beating up is a story for another day.
What were my reactions?
I
was extremely mad at the boy. Due to the school rule against corporal
punishment I kept my hands away from him otherwise I could have given him a
good beating. I warned him sternly never to touch any of the learners. For the
first time he wept bitterly. When I saw him cry so much I was moved and for
the first time I took interest to inquire about his background. He openly
talked to me how he hated his mother because she often beats him. He said that his mother does not love him and
his father has no time for him.
What were my actions?
I knew I
had to do something. During the day I called the mother over the phone and
asked her to come to school the following day. I was so happy that she
responded to my call and was there the following day as we had arranged. A
close chat with the mother revealed that the family was undergoing a serious
marital crisis. The mother admitted severely beating the boy severally even for
mere mistakes. She also said that the boy has a bad experience with a teacher
in the previous school who used to punish him severely whenever he did not do
his work well. His mother is a magistrate and the father a lawyer and they get
transferred frequently which contributes to the boy getting transferred to
different schools. This is the fifth school since he started schooling. At
present he gets to see the mother once in two months because she lives in her
working place. This too might be a contributing factor to his aggressive
behavior and lack of the writing materials he requires in school.
The
mother’s visit gave me a whole picture why the boy behaves the way he does. I talked
to her at length how I find the boy in class. She was so understanding and
willing to cooperate in order to help her son. She promised not to hurt the boy
again and to create time to be with him. She also promised to provide the
materials he needs in school. I too advised her not to let her family challenges
affect the innocent boy. More than the mother, I too felt transformed by the
new understanding I had about the boy then. I made up my mind to draw him close
to me, understand him and slowly help him to come out of his character.
What have I learnt?
From
this incident I have learnt that every behavior has a root cause. There is a
reason behind every character. Every pupil in my class behaves the way they do,
not because they choose to but because circumstances have influenced who they
are. I have learnt never to give up on any pupil’s behavior. The best way to
get to know the learners is to interact with their parents and guardians to get
to know the learners better and device ways of helping them.
Way Forward?
Since
the learner is a special case in my class, I have developed an individualized
education program (IEP) for him in counseling. I conduct several activities
with him on weekly bases to help him clear the junk within and feel loved anew.
He has participated in some drawing and coloring activities, role play
activities all which are therapeutic and are helping him to reconcile with
himself and others. With time I have seen a lot of positive improvement in his
character. He is also becoming responsible in his studies which has brought
forth a remarkable change in his academic performance. It is my dream that the
counseling sessions will restore him to the good boy he was before.
